I am the 378th quickest runner ever at the Y Promenad, Llandrillo-yn-Rhos Parkrun (at the time of writing).
On Saturday I got up 6:30am from a tip off from my brother the week before. There was rumours that Rhos-on-Sea, a suburb of my hometown, was starting a parkrun that day. Previously being an achievement on the 5k App, attending the first parkrun in a location is not quite as prestigious as before – it’s not promoted to stop the newbie run directors being overwhelmed with people coming to attend. So much so, that it felt a little bit underground, a bit hush hush attending the event. Like a drinker in a prohibition era United States, as murky as my half 6 start in Newton-le-Willows.
Although the weather was terrible when I set off, the drive to North Wales was constantly getting better, so it was a cold crisp morning as I parked up. Word had got out a bit, as about 500 parkrunners and walkers showed up at the event. They were ushered into the garden next to the tourist information to get the first timers briefing. With everybody was a first timer nobody was skipping it. After folks were briefed I said a quick hello and goodbye to my brother who showed up with his dog and set off on the route.
The route is perfect for personal bests, running along the Colwyn Bay promenade, from Rhos-on-Sea, past Toad Hall pub, under the pier and just by Porth Eirias before doubling back again. I was surprised that the coast I walked many a time was only 2km or so. It feels a lot longer, certainly looked it. There is a loop but it’s largely flat and concrete – with only sand deposited from the North Sea causing issues. There’s even 2k marked out in the promenade’s mosaic to somewhat time yourself.
Anyway, it wasn’t a day for a personal best due to the numbers attending. I did get rather close though. Probably about a minute back on my personal best. I did push it too hard too early on (I managed my first 1k and 1 mile to be under the goal of a 30 minute 5k), meaning I was struggling towards the end, but I got home in a respectable 33:30 – really only hampering. My goal was to get a photo of the token to proudly declare that I was in X best runner in this blog post, as they had only 450 tokens in total.
Which I did.
It’s nice to have an email with 1 and a name as on the inaugeral parkrun page although the 5k App still lists the run as “Unknown” for now, meaning although I didn’t get the elusive “Y” for my Parkrun alphabet, I did pick up the U!
Overall, the time wasn’t the goal today, it was just to attend, and support, and just be a part of something good for my home town. It gets a bit of stick and having a parkrun there is another thing it’s got going for it. It’s a gorgeous location and looking forward to attend again.
I was today years old to realise that the music for the Commodore 64 game “Lazy Jones” music is the sample used by Zombie Nation’s “Kernkraft 400“.
Kernkraft 400 became Wales’ anthem after a match away at Belgium in the mid-2010s when the DJ played it at half time. I think the favourable conditions for Wales and the 48 hours of Leffe Blonde meant it was swiftly added to Y Wal Goch’s playlist, so much so that it was played in bars as I travelled around France in Euro 2016, usually the ones filled with the Welsh. We were no trouble, like.
You would have thought I’d have become aware of it, given my love of retro games. But no, I was told today. Thanks Matt!
it is quarter to 7 on day 2 of the Ashes test and England are already 7 down in their second innings, with a lead just shy of 200.
It is 6:47 in the morning, and I have been awake for about half an hour and in that time Carse and Atkinson have put up a dogged resistance.
I have therefore determined in my brilliant, Aggers-like analysis of the game that England only play well when I am awake.
This isn’t good, as I like my sleep and I am not a night owl, but if it means beating the Aussies on their home turf, I may pull a few all nighters. This is important for me and the country, so I am willing to do my duty.
….nevermind, Carse was just caught behind. Back to bed I go.
So I’ve figured out today is the day I’ve become a runner. I’ve seen an article on our local news site where there’s a festive fun run taking place in a pub near me. Reading the article I saw that the distance would be “less than one mile”.
My first thought was “Aww, is that all?”.
If only Rhys from 2 years ago could see me now.
If time allows, I’m probably going to try and do it. It’s £2, and it is for a good cause, and the folks at The Griffin are good people. But yeah, that’s a sprint! May run there for a warm up!1
(Header photo is from 2 weeks ago at St Helens’ Parkrun when I set my best 5k time of 33:02. St Helens is a really hilly parkrun so happy with my time. Also I’m wearing my Stonewall FC “Trans Pride” football shirt as I think it’s funny that it exists when EA is going to be sold to a far right regime. Also trans rights.)
You watch when I do it I do something like twist my ankle and fail miserably. Curse my overconfidence! ↩︎
In mid July, when I had a 40+ health check and was instructed to be more active as my blood pressure was high, I decided to look at the Couch to 5k App after a few folks I like rated it. It had been something that I was wanting to do, but the health check gave me the boot up the backside to do it.
I’d argue it’s probably the best thing I’ve done for my health. I’m not a runner. Really not a runner. I was crap at PE and crap at running in particular. Cross country was my least favourite activity in my least favourite sport in school. To explain how bad I am at 40 years of age: in my first ever run with the app you run for 7 x 1minute splits, with a 90 second walk in-between. By the end of that run, I couldn’t do the final 1 minute split.
On Tuesday, I did 30 minutes continued running.
Me after my first run/walk
For me 30 minutes is a wee bit short of 5k for me. The run on Tuesday saw me complete week 9 of Couch to 5k, and the course in general. It’s fair to say that I got a bit emotional. It had it’s ups, it had it’s downs. I got sick of Vernon Kay’s 90’s playlist, I questioned Denise Lewis’ concept of time, I cursed my left calf, but I got there in the end.
There are so many highlights to my journey, but here’s a bunch that come to mind.
The bemused look from a neighbour who I ran past on my first run.
The joy I experienced on my 4th run, which was Week 1 run 3 again, as I had COVID and thought I lost my ability. I didn’t.
The run in London where I ran along the South Bank of London on a gorgeous Friday evening.
I think giving I was running along one of my favourite places in the world, this was the first run I really enjoyed.
The first time I overtook somebody in Mile End Park in London. Granted she was 75 and looked knackered but I did it!
My first Week 4 run, which saw me run along Dusseldorf’s riverfront. It was a tough run.
I needed a shipping container to hold me up in Dusseldorf
My first failure, the Week 4 run 2, in Berlin, where I just couldn’t run up a tiny hill and a chihuahua ran in front of me, causing me to stop. I nearly cried.
The run in Berlin. Gorgeous park, but I just couldn’t do it there and then.
Week 5 Run 3, and the joy I experience when I finished it. It’s a step up that one – a full 20 minutes running!
Smashing my phone on a run, meaning I had to run alone with my thoughts. Not good. Turns out I moan a lot when running.
My first Parkrun, where I set a goal to run under 45 minutes by the end of 2024.
First Parkrun. Picked a hilly bastard one.
My second Parkrun two weeks later, where I ran it in 39:39.
Learning about Zone 2 running which has really helped me. A more efficient fat burning style of running, with less effort, who knew!?!?!
And telling a kid I couldn’t get his ball back he hoofed over the school fence, because I was on a good pace (I’m not too proud of this one).
Couch to 5k done!
I’d really like to publicly thank a bunch of people: Aled, Nat, Fern, Shane & Del who pretty much have had to listen to my questions and the strange selfies over the past 3 months (especially my brother Aled, who I messaged when he was at a wedding to ask about strategies for reducing chafing). But also so many other folks who have given me support on Instagram, Threads and Mastodon. Genuinely couldn’t have done it without you.
But mainly, it’s the Couch to 5k. In little over 4 months, I’ve pretty much gone from panting and wheezing to being comfortable running, to being a Garmin and Strava wanker, buying all sorts of clothes from Decathlon, and probably fitter and healthier I’ve ever been in my life. I’d really recommend it to fat folks like myself wanting to get a bit fitter, as if I can do it (and make a new hobby out of it), I’m confident you can too.
So while certain individuals who are the similar age to me are funding medical research to justify their addictions to South American hallucinogenic plants, I’ll just stick to my running, getting up early on a Saturday to do a Parkrun. I feel it’s easier to justify to the parents, talk about publicly, and – whilst Parkrun is a bit of a cult like community at times – it is something I can discuss at parties and people will not think I’m creepy.
Sorry if that’s a bit boring for a white bloke in tech.
Update December 5th: So very kindly this got mentioned in Tim Nash’s latest newsletter. So hello if you came from Tim’s Newsletter! Please sign the guestbook. I thought I’d give an update, not least because I’ve gone past Couch To 5k.
I’m still running! Once you’re done with the app you’re on to “Beyond Couch to 5k” which are three different runs designed to help you further. They are designed to improve each element: speed, stamina and cadence (which is called “Stepping Stone”, because alliteration). I did fail at these the first time, but I sit here writing this after completing a “speed” run, relatively comfortably at lunchtime today. So once you complete the course you just loop on that for a bit. Though I’d recommend doing parkruns.
I’ve become a regular of doing parkruns recently, albeit on naff all sleep. Last Saturday I did Widnes parkrun. It was my fifth parkrun and 4 of those have been personal bests. The only one that wasn’t was Conwy parkrun where I ran with my sister-in-law who was on week 2 of the Couch 2 5k. She’s now on Week 7. I’m very close to breaking 36 minutes 5k. I’ve also signed up to do the Aintree 5k in a few weeks. I’m going to do Ormskirk parkrun this weekend.
After Christmas I’m probably going to do one less run a week. Cricket season starts again and I want to focus on that – and I’m not like Shane who can do a Parkrun followed by a 40 over match. However, I plan to use the Runna app to structure my training a bit. Consider me bitten by the bug!
Finally – Tim called me an inspiration (which I’m still bemused with). I’m happy to help folks with their running journey. If you want to natter about it then drop me a message on Bluesky, Mastodon or via my contact me page. Always happy to help folks!
